I wish we were reacquainting under better circumstances dear reader, but I'm back with an important PSA. To call Hide the worst restaurant I've been to in a long time is an overly generous assessment of this temple to disappointment. What happened to Ollie’s cooking? It was elegant and light and flavour-forward, but no longer. It’s been replaced by a safe, corporate vision and a production line approach of largely quick-to serve-dishes, necessitated (I guess) by the vast number of covers in this expensive corner of Mayfair. In the move from Fitzrovia, the kitchen left behind all traces of flavour. I’ve never encountered inedible dishes in a £100-plus tasting menu. Hide gave us two: suspiciously mushy blue fin tuna and a king crab devoid of all flavour and texture. Elsewhere the famous Dabbous coddled egg has been revamped for the worse and the great bread has morphed into a tasteless variety basket. We were trapped in this tasting menu mediocrity and only marginally comforted by modest markups on the expansive wine list. I suspect the professional pundits will praise it and Michelin will anoint it with a star (for the staircase alone), but Hide is no Dabbous. That place (RIP) was a breath of fresh air when it opened 5 years ago, but Hide just leaves you gasping to get out.